# Inside the Niche Most Agents Avoid: Divorce Real Estate with Randi Dukes

> Episode 223 of The REI Agent podcast
>
> Hosted by Mattias Clymer, a Realtor with Funkhouser Real Estate Group who leads Valley Homes Team in Harrisonburg, Virginia (https://valleyhomesva.com/about/mattias-clymer/), and Erica Clymer, a licensed therapist and real estate investor.

- **Published:** 2026-09-15
- **Duration:** 00:38:41

## Summary

Randi Dukes is a real estate agent with Repeat Realty in the Dallas-Fort Worth area who specializes in helping families sell a home during divorce. The episode covers how Randi Dukes keeps neutrality between both parties, including the same intake with each side and matching weekly update emails, and why divorce listings come through attorneys and relationships rather than court-record mailers.

## Description

Randi Dukes has done over $32M in volume across 85+ transactions in the niche most agents route around — divorce listings. She got there through her own divorce nine years ago, when she realized the proceeds of a good sale are what let two households actually start over.   Randi and Mattias get into

## Questions This Episode Answers

**How does Randi Dukes stay neutral when selling a home during a divorce?**

Randi Dukes runs the same intake with both parties, even when only one side hired them, because what one person knows is not always what the other knows. Weekly listing updates go out to both parties as identical copied emails so neither side is favored.

**How does Randi Dukes find divorce real estate clients without ambulance chasing?**

Randi Dukes avoids pulling court records to send mailers. Business comes mainly from relationships with divorce attorneys, educational pages on the website that attract searches, and referrals from other agents.

**What questions does Randi Dukes ask during intake on a divorce home sale?**

Randi Dukes asks whether a protective order exists on either side, whether a court order to sell the property is in place, whether any liens are on the house, and whether a second mortgage was ever taken out. Opening title then shows the exact ownership situation.

**What does Randi Dukes do when one party refuses to sign or move out during a divorce sale?**

Randi Dukes describes refusing to sign documents, blocking showings, or refusing to move out as common in divorce real estate. In one case, a party refused to move out, which changed every term of the offer on the table.

**What does Randi Dukes teach about separating emotion from real estate negotiations?**

Randi Dukes teaches that controlling emotions is key to a successful transaction and that there are no emergencies in real estate, only problems with solutions. Give clients full attention, but not all of your emotion.

## Show Notes

Randi Dukes has done over $32M in volume across 85+ transactions in the niche most agents route around — divorce listings. She got there through her own divorce nine years ago, when she realized the proceeds of a good sale are what let two households actually start over.

Randi and Mattias get into how you stay neutral when both parties want you on their side, why she refuses to source clients from court records, what separates a well-written court order from a useless one, and the SEO skills she carried over from twelve years of blogging before real estate.

Golden nugget: "There are no emergencies in real estate. We aren't saving lives. Don't give it all of your emotion."

Find Randi: @randydukesrealtor · randydukesrealtor.com
Book mentioned: Unreasonable Hospitality by Will Guidara

Full show notes and a free weekly newsletter at reiagent.com

## Transcript

**[0:00]** Welcome back to the REI agent. My guest today is Randy Dukes, a certified divorce real estate specialist and agent with Repeat Realty in Dallas-Fort Worth area. Randy has built a practice around one of the most emotionally complex and underserved real estate niches in the business, helping families navigate the sale of a home during divorce. With over 32 million sales volume across 85 plus transactions and recognition of as a top 750 real estate producer in 2025, she has turned a specialization most agents avoid into a durable and meaningful practice. She brings both the technical expertise and the human approach that this kind of work demands. Randy, welcome to the REI agent podcast. Thank you. Glad to be here. I mentioned when you first got on that I felt a little bit weird saying I'm excited to talk about divorce with you.

**[0:55]** It's a bit of a heavy topic. Yeah. Well, let's, before we dive into that, I do want to hear kind of like what got you started in real estate and kind of your journey getting, getting going. So I started as a realtor six years ago at probably one of the worst points ever, right? Three weeks, well, three months before COVID hit in 2020. It didn't make a huge difference for me because I was already starting from square one. So I just dove in really hard. And, um, as we all know, the next year ended up being absolutely crazy. So in some ways I was super lucky to get started at that time because the market was so wild. I, uh, actually have a background of being a nurse, um, years and years ago, and then did content creation for about 12 years before I got into real estate.

**[1:51]** I always joke that I was one of the early bloggers on the scene and created this whole influencer thing. Um, but it prepared me really well for real estate, both on the technical side of things and then just learning to negotiate on behalf of myself and other people. Can you, can you tell us a little bit more about that? Like what were you, what were you, you were blogging? I was, so it started as a complete hobby. Um, blogs were brand new. We were on blog spot and I did it as a little bit of a scrapbook, a way of keeping track with my family. And then I realized that if I was posting about things that were creative or kind of fun, I was seeing more traffic. Other people were, were watching or reading this. And so it led me into this idea that I can probably monetize this.

**[2:49]** Um, and, and that's what I did. So I just initially sold sidebar ads, um, for $30 a pop. And then realized as the gears went on that there were larger companies seeing me, there were, uh, third party platforms that you could work with to get jobs, ended up working with a huge brands, um, across all spaces really. Okay. So this you're doing creative stuff. Like, so was this like any, uh, things related to houses? It was a house projects. Was it interior design? If you're not watching this right now, she's got a, uh, uh, the wallpaper in the background that is, is, is bright. It's a statement. It looks really good, but it tells me that you have that creative side that you, I do love the creative and the color. I was working in that space, doing projects for the home as well as small craft type things. I have five kids. So there were lots of theme parties. There were lots of fun food projects and a little bit of everything. Okay. Very fun. Very fun. So are you blogging now at all for, for real estate? Is that, has that, it sounds like it'd be apples and oranges a little bit. I mean, unless you just kind of continued the same kind of house stuff, but that, that was, you know,

**[4:05]** creative projects or whatever. But, um, as far as like what the real estate market is doing, are you doing any kind of blogs now? I do. That was one of the things that I brought over into real estate. I had learned so much about SEO and how to optimize a website. And it made sense that you could take a lot of those same ideas and apply them to real estate. It's a long-term strategy. Obviously you're not hitting anything overnight, but it is one of the ways that I bring leads into my business through blogging about different things and creating that website. Okay. Yeah. Awesome. And, and have you, one of the things I know, Substack is really popular right now, but that is putting things on their platform, right? So I feel like that, that kind of doesn't do well for your own SEO. Um, have, have you explored that? Have you thought about using Substack or has that been something you've, you've canceled out of your system because of that reason?

**[5:00]** I haven't thought about it a whole lot, but that is a huge deterrent. And even when I first started, we had a website through our brokerage and our CRM. And I quickly opted to not use that because you don't have enough control over the SEO. I wanted to get into the nitty gritty, as much as I know, of the backside of things and really be able to control what those keywords were, um, what the content that I was putting out there that I was trying to be super strategic about directing people to my site. So it didn't make sense to have it living somewhere else that I couldn't control that. Sure. Um, can you give us a couple of quick high level, like tips for increasing your SEO or, or, you know, if, if somebody is using, um, you know, a website that they can control those kinds of things, what would be something that you would suggest? One, I would say be hyperlocal. Um, this is actually something I found easier to do in real estate than it was when I was just trying to write this massive blog that appealed honestly worldwide because being hyperlocal means that you already have this very directed audience and that somehow felt much easier because you can really

**[6:11]** niche down on what you're trying to go for. Keywords are super important. And just, I mean, there's that, that give and take of, you're trying to make sure that you're providing something that's of value for people while also trying to make sure that the audience that's really reading it is in your market. So keywords are super important in that realm. Um, and then just being consistent, like everything else, if you're consistent with writing things, Google is loving that. And now we have the whole AI component. So I've been learning a lot about that. These are really two different things trying to appeal both to Google and to AI and they like different things. They like things phrased differently. So it's a whole world. Yeah. That, that is a really big shift in the industry for sure. And, and just, you know, online traffic in general, I think, you know, looking to get, yeah, the, those crawlers, all the, all the AI, uh, bots to, to, to like what you have is, is a whole different game. So, um, yeah, well, thank you for that. That wasn't, um, part of the, uh, the thought of what we'd be talking about today. Um, but it is really interesting. It is really important.

**[7:23]** I think, you know, web, web presence is definitely important. Um, people do that different ways. I mean, not having the, having a SEO optimized website isn't necessarily a requirement here. And I, and there's definitely people who have, um, pretty much make it with just YouTube. Um, and that is also a hyperlocal thing. YouTube is another huge search engine. Um, second biggest, right. Um, and people who are thinking about coming to your market, um, will often go to, you know, YouTube to, to research. And I think that's where, um, you know, that's another angle of kind of getting, uh, a lead source from, um, keywords and, you know, being hyperlocal can really pay off. Right. Um, so how, how, what, where did the divorce thing come from and, and, and where did you like decide to kind of double down on that, that niche? I got divorced nine years ago and it was really my first experience in my small world with anything like that. Um, and it made me realize at the time we owned a house for most people, their house is, if not their greatest asset, one of their greatest assets. And I realized how important it was that you have the proceeds of a really good sale

**[8:40]** in order to carry on with the rest of your life. So for most people, it's probably helping pay for the actual divorce for attorneys. It's helping you pay off any debt that there may be in the marriage and then helping two different households carry on for the future. So it gave me just a different view. And then I obviously had a different level of compassion as well for what people were going through in that situation. Yeah. Uh, I, I can imagine that would definitely help, uh, to have the perspective to have that. Um, so was that something that you thought about pretty early on? Um, I know that, you know, anybody that's been in the business for a while that they have, have like heard about that being kind of a, uh, you know, an, an area of getting business people needing to, uh, to, to, to sometimes often will buy two houses as well. Right. I mean, that definitely can happen as well.

**[9:35]** So it's definitely from a volume standpoint, it seems like it could be a good opportunity. Um, again, it sounds weird to say that it's an opportunity, but you know, it is. Well, it is, but I think it's harder than most people think it is because where I don't want to be the ambulance chasing version of a realtor in this market. So where do you find these clients? And that's always been a really big deal for me to figure that out. I want to enter into everything in a very relational, compassionate way. So you're not searching court records to then send a mailer to somebody who's going through a divorce. Um, and so it's a lot of relationship building with attorneys. This is where the SEO has really helped me where I just have some educational pieces on my site, um, and have had people find me many way, many times that way, including other agents that have found me and referred clients. So it's a really different piece because the same marketing in my view, I think there are a lot of different ways to do it, but I wanted to be super careful not to do it in a way that felt kind of gross. Yeah, no, I, I totally get it. I mean, it's,

**[10:52]** it can feel predatory maybe. I mean, there's a, that's a great word. And I, and I mean, that's, that's true for other things that can be public record. Like, you know, if, if there is, um, you know, somebody going through, uh, bankruptcy or going through, um, you know, foreclosure, um, you know, sometimes that stuff is public records. And I think it's, it's, um, definitely lists that people get and can target. Um, and, uh, I've talked to, you know, I've talked to people who have specialized in helping people, um, get out from under their foreclosure, um, like, like, or try to like save the mortgage. And I think as a result, their business has gotten some, um, either referrals or, uh, you know, sales from, you know, like people who, who just end up needing to sell, but, but they help a lot of people not have, um, in the process. And I think that's kind of like a, maybe a similar night that you're playing marriage therapy here or anything, but, but an example of where you can maybe niche in a difficult area and not be predatory.

**[11:59]** Agreed. Because it's really what you're bringing to the table in the situation in a divorce situation. It's obviously really tricky. You've got two parties that are often not getting along. Very few divorces end up being amicable in the heat of them. And so you really have this opportunity to care well for people. And I've always loved that side of the business. I, in addition to, to divorce listings, I love anything that's a transition because I think real estate already brings about so much emotion anyway, and being able to really enter well into that is, is something that's beautiful. It brings me back to my nursing. I always used to say in nursing, you have the opportunity to sit with people in their best and worst moments. And there's something really beautiful. It's very much an honor. And weirdly, real estate has that same element to it, where so many times people are buying or selling a house. There's not happiness surrounding it. It might be full of joy, but there's a lot of negative emotion. It might be a death. It might be a divorce.

**[13:05]** It could be downsizing where there's both emotions, good and bad. And that too feels like an honor to get to work with somebody in that situation. That's, that's well said. And I think even in like a circumstance of purchasing a home, upgrading a home, whatever, that it's all positive, like for the reasons behind it, there is often still negative emotion involved with it. It is a stressful time. I mean, moving, moving can be really stressful. When, when things, the way that the other party, you know, negotiates in the home inspection, that kind of stuff can bring out like the best and worst of people. We get to be there with them through that. So I can see how that could be heightened or, well, the, one of the things I was going to ask you, and one of the things that I was just thinking about was in, in a divorce situation. So often, you know, in, in married couples, you know, you're going to have a, one of the people that, you know, might be the person that handles, you know, like if they were to sell a house together, there'd probably be one guy, one person that would be kind of more in charge of it. They handle the logistics, they handle the, you know,

**[14:16]** like they, they, you know, not that they're making all the decisions, but they just kind of have defaulted to person. Now you have a divorce factored in and you have the possibility of like, you know, like people wanting to be like, they're on my team or like, not that they're necessarily trying to get you to be on their side, but I could imagine that's another dynamic that you have to be very cognizant about. So how do you navigate all that? It's probably one of the biggest factors in divorce real estate that you are maintaining this position of neutrality throughout and both sides end up at different times wanting to pull you. They're wanting you to side a little bit depending on what the scenario is. So neutrality is huge. And sometimes there's always one person, as you said, that starts the situation that's pulling in the agent. And that might be based on a court order. It could just be based on preference. There are a lot of different ways that that happens. And then once you've spoken with that one person and done intake, you're doing the exact same intake with the other person as well.

**[15:21]** Which isn't always simple because sometimes there is a party that isn't loving the idea that this house is being sold, but you really have to go through the exact same thing. Because in a situation like this, where communication may not have been great for the last few years, what one party knows is not always what another party knows. And then throughout the transaction, keeping that neutrality, even down to sending an email to this party first this time and this party first next time, or copying and pasting. So when I give a weekly update on your listing, it's an email that goes out with all of the information. Because again, one person may not know anything about the showings that are going on. It's a copy and a paste so that there can never be any idea that one person is being favored over another.

**[16:09]** So I guess like probably the first challenge for you is to win over that other party that didn't bring you in, right? Right. And that's like, you know, hey, I don't want to use their agent. I mean, I can imagine there's things like that that happen, right? Right. That's exactly right. And it shows up at different times throughout this transaction as well. But definitely that first phone call to the other side that didn't start that didn't initiate this, this situation is the harder phone call, just introducing who you are, what you're going to be doing, and then trying to get some basic information. And then even your intake is so different. You're asking questions that are deeply personal, but you have to know, is there a protective order on either side? Is there a court order to sell the property? Are there any liens on the house? Sometimes one party knows about that. The other party doesn't. Has the second mortgage ever been taken out? Divorce just by nature of being not a great scenario often ends up with financial issues as well. So you're really diving in super deep right from that get go. And then opening title to find out, okay, what is the exact

**[17:28]** scenario of this house? Just so many moving pieces in that divorce world. What are some tricks to winning over that other party early on? Because I mean, you kind of have to, yeah, I mean, like you said, you have to ask these really deep personal questions pretty fast. But usually I'm sure you're trying to build the rapport and kind of trying to get some buy-in from them at the beginning. Yeah. So one being very black and white, treating it very much as a transaction, keeping my emotion out of it. And in these types of transactions, that's sometimes harder. I've had very rude things said to me. I've had people blow up. I've been yelled at, called names. It's not for the weak of heart or the faint of heart. But you have to realize always the perspective. This is just a tricky situation. So keeping your own emotion in the midst of that, and then honestly, just trying to show compassion. This is a really hard situation. And so I always find that when somebody is deeply emotional or angry or any of those more negative emotions, entering into it with compassion and understanding can really dial things down a lot.

**[18:51]** Yeah. So like probably really trying to show, yeah, the empathy, compassion with also somehow conveying that you're not going to be taking sides in the, I'm not there. I'm also your agent. And I'm wondering about if there's a way, an angle with a fiduciary duty, if you can highlight that, that I would have fiduciary duties to represent both of you all equally. It's something that, you know, it's a tough, tough situation, but I want to make sure you understand that I'm working at, for both of you, and we will work at it from a neutral standpoint. Yeah. Just kind of off my head. Very much. And just a lot of things that I understand. I understand this is really hard. I understand this is difficult. I understand you're doing something you don't want to do.

**[19:46]** Just showing that compassion to both sides, especially if it's the side that didn't hire you from the beginning. And then sometimes it just comes down to, I know this is hard. There is a court order to sell this property. And so now my job is to get you the best out of that court order. So I want to help you be set up for success on the other side of this. This might not be what you wanted, but this is where we have to go from here. Yeah. That makes sense. That makes sense. Because I mean, ultimately they would have to still sign a listing agreement, right? I mean, like, They do. Yeah. So it's not like, Go ahead. Sorry. Right. There's a court order, but that doesn't mean that people are moving out and allowing showings and signing documents. Sometimes in a court order, um, divorce attorneys get very, very specific and those are always the best. They may even list who the listing agent is to be. They'll give deadlines for things, but sometimes there'll be a clause in there that says if there is a good offer and the agent thinks this is a good offer, but both parties aren't agreeing, the agent actually gets to make the

**[20:53]** final decision. Now that's a really nice protection. It's also really difficult to be that person who's saying, Hey, we are accepting this. Yeah. That would be hard. It's very hard. Yeah. You'd almost want the attorney to take that off. Right. Right. And honestly, in real estate, what I find is that the attorney, once that order is written, they want to back out of this. The only time that they're really involved again is if somebody is absolutely not doing what they're supposed to be doing, according to the order. But at that point, the house is not their area of expertise. And so most are backing off and just letting the agent take over. Sure. That makes sense. Um, yeah, that's really fascinating. I think it, it is definitely, it's, it's cool that, um, I feel like you, you found a purpose in it. Uh, I think that like, you know, having the experience and having the empathy, um, can turn what turn, turn like the, the really hard times, um, into something like, uh, you know, it's, it's, it's part of the process.

**[21:59]** It's part of, you know, why of, of doing it, uh, which probably helps you sustain it. And I think, you know, to underline your point earlier, like this probably isn't for everybody, like, you know, it might sound great that you can get three transactions out of one from a consistent referral, uh, source, but you know, it, it, it's not all a bed of roses. I think you have to have a level of passion for it because it is really difficult. There are times I just laugh and think, what am I doing? This is one of the most difficult types of situations you can probably have in real estate and I'm seeking this out. So I think you do have to feel a lot of passion for it. And I get a number of referrals from other agents, even in my market area who just know, Hey, I don't want to deal with the messiness of this. And so they'd rather refer it out to another agent who understands it a little better. Yeah, that totally makes sense. And I think like, that is definitely something I preach all the time in, on the show is, is, you know, knowing when to step away, knowing when to fire people, um, like you, like, you know,

**[23:07]** we have a holistic approach to life through real estate under here as our, you know, our sub theme. If, if you are getting sucked dry from a transaction, which all of us have experienced, like if you have, you have a client or whatever that is just making your life miserable, um, it's not worth it. And, and so I think like, you really have to consider if you're going to do a niche like this, if, if you have that passion, if you have that, you know, that desire to really help people. Cause I mean, cause at the end of the day, that's the reward, right? I mean, you are helping people, you are, you are providing a really important service to people who really need it. It's just that they will ooze on you. Right. Yeah. Have you, have you had people, I would imagine this happens a lot, but like, have you, have you had people or any stories that come to mind where you've had people come back and like really thank you and apologize for, for how things went at certain times when it got low? Yeah. Usually that person who blew up somewhere in that transaction comes back at the end and they are grateful. Now the house is sold. They have a

**[24:09]** check in their account. Um, and there've been a lot of apologies of, I'm sorry. I, it's the emotion of it. And this is the part I don't take it personally. I understand this person is going through probably one of the most stressful experiences of their life and I, I can take it. Yeah. Well, kudos to you. Cause I don't think a lot of people could and it, it, or just repeatedly, you know, like that, I think that can get, and I'm sure like if you were having, like, there's probably easier ones than others. And I would imagine if you have like three or four at the same time, it could probably start feeling like, Oh my gosh, what am I doing? Yeah. True. But also there's another side to it. When you're selling a property just for somebody who is selling their house at some point, they might make a decision that they're not selling.

**[24:59]** This market is not working out. They're not going to do this. They hate listing price. Divorce real estate is different because they are selling this house. So there is this weird sense of security in it where, you know, there are only certain things you can control in this transaction anyway. And your job is just to keep working as hard as you can to get this done, but the house is going to be sold. Yeah. That makes sense. Yeah. I can totally understand that. Yeah. Um, are there any funny anecdotes without giving out personal details? Um, you can share, I'm sure there's been, I'm sure you have some stories. Yeah. I don't know if they're funny is the problem. Um, lots of situations of one person is absolutely refusing to sign documents.

**[25:48]** They may be refusing to let somebody come in and see the house. Um, I have a situation where they're refusing to move out. So that has altered every bit of the offer that we have on the table. Um, it's not really funny, but it also is par for the course. These are really common scenarios in divorce real estate. Okay. Yeah, no, it's wild. I had, uh, yeah, I don't know if I could say I have any funny ones either. Um, but there's, there's, there's been some interesting ones. I, I, you know, had somebody that had multiple, uh, uh, rental properties, like 12 that we had to work through. And that was, that was an interesting process through the whole thing. Um, but, but anyway, um, what have you, have you, I would imagine that's not your full book of business. Um, and I would imagine you stay in touch with these people, um, as well, um, post-closing and, and try to have like that sphere. So what, what other kind of, um, practices do you do to kind of maintain your business? And I'm a big sphere and referral person. Although interestingly, divorce doesn't always play into that because sometimes those people are just a done, it's

**[27:09]** a part of their life. They need to completely close off. So I actually, with at least 50% of my divorce closings, they're not people that I continue and that's their choice. Um, they just, they need to close the door on that. But in my business in general, I, I will keep in touch with you until you tell me to go away. I love the relational element. I love that for a month or more, I am completely enmeshed in your life. I know your kids, I know your dog's name. And so really love to continue that relationship later. I'm big on, um, pot buys and little surprise gifts. And, um, I do a lot of marketing and directed work toward my sphere, which is where a lot of that sphere, um, and referral source comes in. And then I also just do a lot of broad marketing. I have certain things that I love, as I said, the transition. So I kind of look at that. I, that's downsizing.

**[28:10]** It's all of these different things. Um, I do, I teach classes. I do a lot of the SEO work. I do mailers. I've cast a wide net initially, and now I'm actually trying to hone it in a little bit and go really deep on the things that work well and the things that I think go with who I am, but I'm a big net person. Sure. Oh yeah. That's awesome. Yeah. That is interesting about it being like kind of a closed chapter and, and, and kind of having to remind them. Um, that that's a part I hadn't considered, but you know, I mean, I think, yeah, I, I have to, I have to quickly plug, uh, some of the stuff you said to, to our, our CRM related really quick. We have a CRM. If you go to reiagent.com where, um, you are able to actually keep track of things like the kids names. Um, if, if a birthday comes up, you can keep track of that there and keep track of the pets names, um, their occupations, it's, it's all forward based. So, so, you know, family occupation, recreation and dreams. Um, so that when you are communicating with your clients, um, that you can say things to them that they care about, right? So like things like that they care about. And in that conversation, if you just simply

**[29:23]** kind of keep track of those details a little bit, uh, the CRM is designed to then be able to give you smart, um, options or, or prompts to, uh, communicate to your clients. So like if, if they know it's an anniversary, if they know it's a birthday, um, if you know, it's a kid's birthday, if you know, it's a kid's going to be starting a new thing like high school. Um, these are great opportunities to like show that you, you care that, you know, you're, you think about your sphere and, um, you don't have to have it all in your head floating around there. Some people are better than I am. Um, but yeah, this is allows for technology to make you authentic to people, not try to take you out of, um, try to pretend authentically it's you. Um, but giving you prompts and smart things that will just build that relationship. Um, so again, go to riaagent.com.

**[30:15]** Um, Randy, what about, uh, golden nuggets? Do you have any golden nuggets for our listeners today? I do. And I kind of, I think these go across the board, not just for divorce, but for, um, really all of real estate. And I did allude to a couple of these already cause they just come up constantly. But, um, one that I think is huge, I'm an associate broker at our brokerage. And I see this all the time. Controlling your emotions is the key to a successful transaction. And in everything we're dealing with people who are already emotionally, even if it's good emotion, you have got to be the person. I'm not saying not to celebrate and maybe even cry and deal with all of the things with a client, but when it comes down to the nitty gritty of the negotiation, I think keeping your emotions out of it creates a very good transaction every time.

**[31:09]** I want to underline that really fast. Um, that so true. There was a huge, uh, shift in my business and shoot huge. Uh, yeah, well I, cause I cared so much. I wanted to build my business so much that I, that I kind of cared too much about the transaction. Um, and, and that had negative, um, for the reasons you're talking about sometimes, I think there's one example where I tried too hard to keep the deal together and I should have just saw the right. Um, but I've poorly described it in the past where I've called it like taking the title. I haven't even read the book, the subtle R of not giving a F, um, and describe it that way. But I don't even know really fully what that book's about. But the point I was trying to make is, is separating the emotion from it. I mean, cause like if you are able to provide an amazing service that isn't wrapped up in emotion, um, and you are able, you become the, like the center for them. And people have often told me then that I've, you know, like I just wanted to talk to you cause I was like, you know, it calms me down, you know, at eight, right. There are no emergencies in real estate and every solution has a problem.

**[32:19]** Those two things I remind myself of all the time. We can find a solution for anything. Now it may not be your ideal solution, but it's going to be a solution. And there are no emergencies in real estate. There may feel like there are emergencies, but there aren't this, we aren't saving lives. And so I'm not saying not to give it all of your attention, but don't give it all of your emotion. Yeah. A hundred percent. Well said. Sorry. And then other nuggets, I think, um, Tom Ferry always says, do what's in your DNA. And I think there's a lot of truth to that. I think that we can try all of the marketing in the world. If it doesn't resonate with you, you're not going to do it. So if you hate cold calling and door knocking, you're not going to do it. So you have to do the things and, and there's a caveat to that because you do have to push yourself out of your comfort zone and just do the work at different times, but you have to do what feels good for you. What actually fits with your personality. So that may be the pot buys, the birthday cards, all of those things. If you're already bent toward that kind of relational focus anyway, doing, doing what's in

**[33:28]** your DNA is way more of a win than forcing yourself to do what you hate doing. And then the other one is, um, and I say this all the time too, but every bit of lead generation is a long-term strategy. And I think agents are always looking for the quick win, but you have to view everything as this is the beginning and it's the follow-up, the constant follow-up that actually gets you to the finish line. And if we're viewing things like an open house, if you didn't get a client that day, it doesn't mean that wasn't success. It means you better be talking to that person for the next maybe two years until they finally transact. So everything is a long-term strategy and you'll take away a lot of your disappointment if you think of it that way. Yeah, it's really true. You're planting seeds in many ways and it can be hard when you're starting. Um, because, uh, you know, you don't see that eventually all these seeds that you've, uh, planted compound and then, and then results in a bunch of fruit that, you know, like, you know, comes in. So like, I think there's often, uh, especially in slower markets where like it, uh, you might take three years of, of seed planting,

**[34:42]** right. Uh, to, to really see kind of like, uh, uh, you know, uh, in your, uh, the results from it and it can be challenging to kind of see it through, but you're absolutely right. Those are, those are really good nuggets. Thank you. Um, what about a favorite book? One that you think that's fundamental that everybody should read or just one that you're currently enjoying? Yeah. So I'm an avid reader. I'm always digging into some kind of good book. I love books about the business. I love hearing how people do things differently, but one of my absolute favorites, which goes along with everything we've talked about today is unreasonable hospitality, just this idea of creating surprise and delight. So you're giving people the unexpected. And I love finding ways to actually make that a standard part of my business, maybe sending cookies when the difficult option period comes to an end or, um, delivering the little birthday gift or delivering a bag of diapers.

**[35:39]** When you find out a client's pregnant, those little ways of just creating this next level relational hospitality, I think is so cool. I love it. There's a couple of things that you said now, um, that have, have reminded me of, so I have a book coming out and, and, and in the process, uh, this is kind of a story of a kid becoming the REI agent, right? It's like they're, they're going through the whole process of, of like what I think that is. And, um, this self-discovery is, I think really important. I think who you are understanding who you are is huge. And I think there's various, uh, you know, personality tests, uh, things that can help you along that path. Um, there are ones that I like better than others, but I think just the journey in general is really important. I think understanding, um, if you're going to, you know, burn out really fast, cold calling, um, don't do that. It's definitely not for everybody, but for others, it, it, they can, they can handle a hundred nose and be totally fine. Um, so it's, it's definitely something to, to know about yourself and that's going to help. The other thing is kind of brand archetypes. Um,

**[36:42]** and I think that kind of what you just highlighted is a classic, uh, Disney type, um, like Disney, and I'm blanking on the actual magician, I think is what it's called. That's the brand archetype, uh, where you are providing this amazing experience. Like, like, you know, every little detail is considered and, you know, like from like Disney, the trash is never emptied. It's goes down, you know, into tunnels or whatever from, from the top. So like, like that is a really awesome thing that you could, you could really lean into and that kind of book be perfect, um, for that. And, and even if that's not your main focus, like it could be a great reminder of like, you know, how you can make this, you know, even more special thing for, so I love that. Randy, finally, um, if anybody's interested in following you on social media, uh, reading your blogs about what kind of wallpaper they should put. No, uh, but seriously, where can people find you if they want to find out more information about you? I'm Randy Dukes Realtor on almost all social media platforms. Um, and then my website is Randy Dukes Realtor.com and my blog is linked up on the main page there.

**[37:55]** And all of this will be in the show notes. If you're driving down the road and don't have the ability to write, uh, any notes of, from these awesome golden nuggets, uh, definitely go to reiagent.com, sign up for the newsletter. Um, and the summary of these episodes will all come once a week. Um, and there will be a blog about this episode as well. Um, so definitely check that out. Um, Randy, thank you so much for being on the show. Uh, it was an honor talking to you. It was great talking to you as well. Thanks for listening to the REI agent. If you enjoyed this episode, hit subscribe to catch new shows every week, visit reiagent.com for more content until next time. Keep building the life you want.

**[38:35]** All content in the show is not investment advice or mental health therapy. It is intended for entertainment purposes only.

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